Cool kids' table

I have survived almost three weeks at my new job! Woohoo!

Starting this job hasn't kicked my butt nearly as much starting my job in North Carolina. I don't know if I'm just used to the early hours, or if I don't have to lie as much so I'm not as tired (I have a desk and a computer and an office with a door and everything!!!). Personally, I think being on Central time has a lot to do with it because all my favorite shows are on at nine instead of ten, and I can still watch them and get to bed at a decent time.

I sound like an old lady.

Anyway, my job is going pretty well so far, but one thing I've noticed is that I'm definitely not one of "them." I'm not officially part of the department that my physical office is in; I partner with them, but I don't work with them and definitely not for them. Because of this, everybody is really friendly and nice, but it feels like I'm more tolerated than included.

I'm okay with this arrangement. I like doing my own thing, and I like that I'm not part of their drama. Not that they have drama drama, but they are a fairly large office and they have a lot of relationships and dynamics to manage that I don't really have to deal with as an outsider. They're also very high energy and always on the move, and I'm much more mellow at work. I still do fifteen things at once like they do, I just am more... contained is the word that's coming to mind.

Plus, they're mostly younger than me - by quite a bit actually - and while this shouldn't matter, I sometimes feel like I can't relate to them.Sometimes I sit in our meetings and think, "Wow, you have no idea." A few of them have been in the workforce for less than a year, and just don't have the years of experience I'm used to in my colleagues. I use these opportunities to teach and I try hard not to preach, but the looks I get often seem like, "Who let the old fart in?"

I think the biggest thing I've noticed, though, is I'm not part of their social interaction. They hang out after work, they joke around during the day, and they stop by each others' offices all day long. This doesn't happen with me. Part of it is that I don't share their work so they don't need to ask me questions or share their experiences, but part of it is that I just don't relate to them. I've joked to my friends that it feels like high school and they're the cool kids and I'm the nerd (again), but it's not like that. Because I work at a university, I think it's more appropriate to describe them as members of a fraternity, while I'm GDI (that's g**damn independent, or non-Greek, for you non-higher educators). They share a common experience and have bonded around that shared experience, and I'm on the outside doing my own thing. We work at the same place, and often attend the same meetings, but what we take away from our jobs and our meetings are very different. While I'm not envious of their jobs at all, nor do I really want to be part of their fraternity, I do envy the collegial nature of their work.

And you know, every now and then, it's nice to be invited to the cool kids' table.